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Feb. 11th, 2010 | 08:19 am

Hes so special. He eyes are so beautiful, I love looking at him. I love holding him and touching him. I love the way his skin feel, his whole body. Every curve memmorized, because they're so beautiful and soft and warm. When he wraps his arms around me, the butterflies in my stomach start to race. His voice makes everything better, that amazing little laugh of his..almost just a chuckle, so soft. I heard it on the phone lastnight and I melted. For the rest of my night at work, I'd hear it played back in my head and just continue to melt. I just want to hold him. No, I want to kiss him. He hates kissing me but I love his lips they're so soft and warm. His whole self is so soft and warm, its almost as if it radiates out all of the love he doesn't have for me. I sometimes feel so loved, but I have to remind myself thats not the case, and it's just I love him too much. It blinds me, I love him so much, hes so sweet and he he mkes me feel so good. He makes everything better, which im guessing is why I feel as if he does love me at times. But I push all of that out & away. This is the best thing thats ever happened to me. The most amazing man to ever walk into my life. How is it someone so amazingly wonderful and beautiful not have been taken? Why me? Why was I so special? One night together after the bar, and just like that we were together almost 24/7. Is this what he does with all of them? Or am I truly special? How would I ever know? I shouldnt think too hard into it. Valentines day in 3 days, apperntly he's never really celebrated it before. I've never had a happy Feb. 14th, so it should be a really amazing day to remember, hopfully pretty special for the both of us.

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